Sunday, June 6, 2010

Sunday's Quote: 140-character maximum

I often wondered about having my own Twitter feed, and now that I've had this virtual soapbox since mid-March, I understand it's appeal.  Aside from the first dozen or so Tweets that went missing (and never recovered), I have derived a list -- originally intended to be a top 10 -- of my 40 personal favorites:

1) "I'm not a vegetarian, but picking off an unsuspecting deer like a sniper does not appeal to me, nor would it make me feel more like a man."
-- May 6, 4:44 AM

2) "The FAA is about to fine FedEx $1.6 million.  My bad."
-- May 19, 1:11 PM

3) "Atheism doesn't seem nearly as plausible when your jetliner takes an unexpected nosedive at 37,000 feet."
-- April 18, 6:32 AM

4) "There's a difference between antiquated dogma and Truth.  The meaning of Good Friday is what separates Christianity from all the others."
-- April 2, 3:08 PM

5) "Does it feel like we are being conditioned to ignore the evidence directly in front of our faces per a fear of being falsely labeled?"
-- May 28, 3:12 AM

6) "Be not guilt-tripped into submission.  Ever."
-- May 31, 3:29 PM

7) "Hey China, how many illegals do you have?  I figured you were too busy oppressing political dissidents and the Tibetans to notice us."
-- May 17, 5:07 PM

8) "Black Conservatives are practically heroes to me.  They know what they believe, why they believe it, & and are prepared to defend it anytime."
-- April 6, 6:25 PM

9) "My first lesson in management came about eight years ago: When everyone says 'You can trust me,' it means you can't trust anyone."
-- May 22, 3:18 AM

10) "When a Leftist (Jon Stewart) says 'Go F yourself,' it's funny & cool.  If a Right Winger says the same thing, it's bigoted and mean-spirited."
-- April 21, 5:44 PM

11) "I've learned that you can't make a self-esteem omelet without breaking a few 'friendships' (no matter how good they may appear to be)."
-- May 13, 12:05 PM

12) "I'm assuming Fox News has a rule that says female anchors, unequivocally, must resemble Miss America contestants."
-- March 28, 1:37 PM

13) "As if The View wasn't mind-numbing enough, who told Joy Behar that having her own show would be a good idea?"
-- May 25, 6:15 PM

14) "Not to brag, but I am intelligent, passionate, and blessed with exquisite taste."
-- April 9, 5:15 AM

15) "Mexico doesn't hesitate to deport anyone who enters their country without proper ID... but America can't?  I'm really beside myself on this."
-- April 27, 8:22 PM

16) "Never yield to false labels."
-- May 10, 4:51 PM

17) "Actually Mr. President, a nation without borders is no nation at all.  So yes, we really are defined by our borders.  Stop with the rhetoric."
-- May 19, 11:12 AM

18) "'Jersey Shore' typifies everything I dislike, belittle, and strive to avoid.  Just sayin'."
-- March 29, 3:15 PM

19) "An Andy Warhol self-portrait (c. '86) sold three days ago for over $32.5 million.  That, my friends, is lunacy."
-- May 15, 5:24 PM

20) "Hey Rev. Al: 'Take our country back' is, indeed, code.  It means 'Socialism sucks.'  Implying a racial context is garbage."
-- March 29, 4:27 PM

21) "The Left is fixated with the mere idea of H.C. reform, and the Right is focused on its fiscal reality.  The difference is self-explanatory."
-- March 28, 7:14 PM

22) "Do kids today realize that the vast majority of the music their generation listens to is complete crap?"
-- April 1, 1:55 AM

23) "I hear that Aerosmith 'damn near' split up.  Maybe playing some real Rock 'n' Roll, instead of pop songs, would heal old wounds."
-- March 31, 4:07 AM

24) "So the Tea Party is worthy of every negative label, but La Raza's self-righteous incitement of sedition and revolution is just fine.  Wow."
-- May 12, 12:58 PM

25) "Portfolio.com ranks Memphis 64th (out of 67) for quality of life among metro areas with 750,000 or more.  Don't move here."
-- May 24, 11:03 AM

26) "'An Inconvenient Truth' mentioned threat of rising sea levels to U.S. beaches, which explains Gore's new purchase: a $9 million beach house."
-- May 7, 3:50 AM

27) "Opposition to Arizona's illegal immigrant law (SB 1070) crumbles when compared to Mexico's immigrant laws.  They're draconian & racist."
-- May 21, 5:44 PM

28) "So a guy in Missouri with no front teeth and less than $30 to his name won the $258 million Powerball lottery.  Life... is... not... fair."
-- April 23, 4:51 PM

29) "Evidently Keith Olbermann and Chris Matthews don't realize that condescension & partisan hackery make them neither appealing nor believable."
-- May 10, 3:41 AM

30) "Fox News' Megyn Kelly is what we heterosexual males refer to as 'a total package.'  She really is dreamy."
-- April 1, 4:20 PM

31) "Must the Williams sisters dress like strippers for nearly every tennis tournament?"
-- May 23, 5:07 PM

32) "Someone tell Halle Berry to stop calling me.  Just because she's available now, it doesn't necessarily mean I'm interested.  Thanks anyway."
-- May 3, 5:47 AM

33) "Is it just me, or is Sarah Jessica Parker viciously unattractive?"
-- April 21, 3:31 PM

34) "Gabourey Sidibe was on SNL last night.  She reminds me of someone, but who?  Oh yeah, about 3,000 of my co-workers."
-- April 25, 2:48 PM

35) "Interesting how peaceful the Tea Parties are, and how rambunctious the pro-illegal alien rally in Arizona was.  A noticeable contrast indeed."
-- April 27, 6:59 PM

36) "Our financial conundrum is the result of both the GOP & the Dems disregard for our national welfare.  It's like they're doing it on purpose."
-- May 22, 3:51 PM

37) "According to The Daily Beast, my home State of Tennessee is the most corrupt in the nation.  But to be fair, most of that is Memphis' fault."
-- May 13, 3:50 AM

38) "I feel the same about the 'Right Wing' militia in Michigan as I feel about the Left Wing militia in Congress and the media."
-- March 30, 5:06 PM

39) "You might say the Tea Party has some clout.  Get used to it."
-- May 18, 7:25 PM

40) "As pennies become dollars, inches become miles.  That is how every journey begins... but where do I start?"
-- April 3, 3:46 AM

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